What does it mean to be a partner? My husband of six months and I have been discussing this idea recently. Both of us are fiercely independent, ridiculously stubborn, and strongly opinionated individuals, and there are times when those qualities can make us feel miles apart from one another. At home, it’s almost too easy for us to pursue our own separate interests. I can consume myself with a project in the kitchen while he is engrossed in “the game” on TV. Out with friends, if someone expresses a view on a subject, we can find ourselves on opposite sides of the same issue. Sometimes this leads to arguments when we get home, usually him not feeling “backed up” by me.
Since becoming a partner, I have had to come to terms with the independent and stubborn side of myself. She doesn’t want others to see my husband and me as one person. My fear of losing me drives the need to let others know when I disagree with something my husband says. This can leave him feeling hurt and alone. I am trying to appreciate my husband and his opinions for what they are, and not always let everyone know that I am not him. I can stand on my own two feet and be his wife at the same time. This takes some skill and tact that I hope I will master over time. I can’t think of any couples that I know who are exactly like one another. When I became a wife, my life became partnered with his. I need to remind myself to recognize that it is our differences that draw us together and keep life interesting. I also need to remind myself that having a partner adds fullness to my life. It does not take away from who I am.
Posted by Mrs. Sweatpants
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